


Vent

by orphan_account



Series: Vent [1]
Category: Fake News RPF
Genre: Established Relationship, Infidelity, Love, M/M, One True Pairing, One-Sided Relationship, Sadism, Slash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-02-25
Updated: 2013-02-25
Packaged: 2017-12-03 13:37:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/698840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stephen rants about his complicated relationship with Jon.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Review

I never stop being annoyed by you. The way you boss me around and hold it over me that you introduced me to my wife is particularly irritating. These gay little skits you have me to do are embarrassing. I'm lucky that Evelyn takes them so lightly. One night she turned her face to me from behind her latest novel and suggested that they were a sign that I had a secret admirer. As if. And then you kissed me for the first time. And then for the first time I kissed you back and for the not-so-first-time I started an improper relationship with my boss, but it was different this time.

You dangled your insurance on the both of us before my eyes on national television and in interviews. Before I knew it I was the one pining to make our affections more public at great risk to our everyday lives. You insisted that I be more discreet. "We have such a good thing going for us right now" you assured me with the smiling eyes of a politician pacifying his clingy whore.

I surpassed you. I got my own show that some like more than yours but in the wings of my studio you're still the boss. You still have me lagging behind you on a choke leash to my office. You would bend my over the desk. MY desk. The way you would with your desk. I go home and I hate myself for letting you mark me in inconspicuous places. 

I listen to you brag about your encounters with your wife, sporting half an erection at the thought of you and the disappointment of sharing you. I don't know why it bothers me, it's not as though I've stopped sleeping with Evelyn but that's just it. I haven't been. Not frequently anyway. She wonders why I'm so distant but leaves it alone for the most part because I'm still a good dad. My duties are easy, my recreation is complicated.

I still don't think you get exactly how much you're fucking me up. You locked us up in a hotel for days and ordered room service and drank the whole mini bar. You exhausted and dehydrated me. I arched to sip your sour whiskey mouth. You told me you loved me and pet my hair. You finally let me drink and sucked me off and on the fifth night left me there in my sleep. All the dinners I missed just to watch you eat non-kosher meals and beg for bites I will never get back. 

You didn't answer when I called you. I left you a voicemail "You are killing me you prick." When I saw you again and you held me with sincerity. Oliver saw us and you didn't even flinch and right there my hope for another I love you was restored. 

You went off the grid for another week. What was I supposed to do? Go to your house? I called Tracey just to hear you were still alive. Then you took me away for the weekend and that time you didnt leave my side and you treated me like a human being. The sex was missionary, unprotected, and so full of love. Like the first lay on your honeymoon night. 

Work started up again and you stood up for me in front of Papa-bear Bill Oreily. God how I wanted you then. I had already thanked you but you fucked me on that desk and made me thank you over and over. Jon-the-dom was back. Jon-the-lover is always nice while he lasts. I love them both. I love you however you are. I will never stop loving you but christ I will never stop being annoyed by you Jon.


	2. The State of The Union

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stephen looks back on the brighter times in his relationship with Jon and contrasts them with the current state of their relationship

Remember that time we spent the whole weekend in your studio? We didn't go home and nobody called asking for us. Everything was different then. We were younger of course but there was more. You were my friend then as well as my lover. Now you're...well I don't know.

We were still so new to each other. You pushed me through the corridors in your ergonomic office chair on wheels. You were blindfolded and I directed you. We crashed into more than a few walls. All of that foolishness was easy. It was familiar. It was everything we were before we became more. Getting down to the real stuff was hard. The first kiss of the night was so timid. We felt obligated to our wives to at least sleep with each other that first night. How backwards is that?

You placed your hand on my thigh and I was covered in goosebumps. The hot rush I felt then wasn't shame from knowing that I was being unfaithful. I was nervous. God I felt like a virgin again. You weren't the first man, you were just different than the rest. When you deepened the kiss I felt faint. I was so turned on.

Just look at you then and you'll get what I'm talking about. Your dark hair and eyes were so flattering to your features. You did this thing when you raised your eyebrow. You still do it and it melts me from inside out. You were and are so different from everyone else. That swagger. I was doomed from the start. You fucker.

I looked into your eyes from beneath you on that famous desk of yours. How you groaned when I whispered "Jonathan." You told me how much you loved it. I said it over and over as you kissed me down my jawline. That first time was so amazing. It was sweet and gentle.

At one point my eyes rolled back, my head spun, and when I opened my eyes again I was floating. From above you I drank in the image of you over me. I watched you fucking me from some heavenly place in the rafters. Staring into the sunken places of your shoulders I knew that I could love you. I closed my eyes again to pin back my tears, my ecstasy, my lust. With a nauseating rush of air I was thrown back into my writhing body holding back the three little words on the tip of my tongue. I wasn't ready to tell you.

I wasn't ready to tell you for a month. It was always waiting in my mouth. It made an unexpected prison break in the corridor of your studio. You held my hand and as Carrel passed you smiled and let go, booking ahead of me to the parking lot. The first of many emotional rejections you put me through. Fucker.

It wasn't all that long before you rebounded. You met me in a janitorial closet for a quick fuck and dreamily breathed out your first I love you's into my ear over and over as you climaxed. I swooned but I think I would have carried on like that even if the statement was never reciprocated. I was trapped by my adoration of you. You stupid fucker.

Today I looked in the mirror at my weak jaw and attempted to convince myself that I was still handsome. Such a stupid exercise. I know I'm handsome. I've said it again and again but Dr. Good-For-Nothing keeps telling me "That's not the point. The problem is that you only believe it because he's chosen you for his sick games. You need to believe it for yourself." Why haven't I fired her yet?

When I saw you this evening, when I see you any evening, I wonder what I'm doing in therapy. I feel like I've been disloyal to you somehow. You're the man I love. God what am I doing? You pushed me onto your desk like that first time. I smiled welcoming your kiss. Everything was like before.

You continued to kiss me passionately. That hot rush washed over me. Your hands breeched my coat working slowly down the sides of my torso. I moaned approvingly. Your lips skipped along my jawline and fell into the hollow of my shoulder. You began to laugh. "What is it?" I asked you.

"Do you have any idea how huge Cenac's cock is?" You chuckled with the answer locked and loaded to gloat about.

You sadistic fucking fuck.


	3. White Wall Wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stephen contemplates if he's willing to continue under the parameters of he and Jon's relationship or if he can bargain for much more.

You tried to assure me that it wasn't as it sounded. Cenac had only showed you his dick. It was like one of those casual locker room situations. Stupidly I asked you if you thought that constituted cheating. You shrugged. You asked me if I thought what I was doing with you could be considered cheating on my wife. You've always been a smart ass prick. I didn't know what to say so I left you there.

You made me get home late. My kids were already sleeping. Evelyn was somewhere in the house. I settled on my couch and found your title in the DVR. I selected the most recent episode. The actual sequence of the show is mere background noise to the highlight reel of your many facial expressions. Every eyebrow raise and micro-smile makes me whine on the inside. You stick that tongue of yours out and I throb with nostalgia but quickly recoil at the mental image of Cenac having access to the private cache of your most intimate expressions. I was angry at you.

"You should stop doing that to yourself" her voice broke my torrid tranquility. Evelyn was standing in the corridor to the bedrooms in that monogrammed knee length robe I got her for Christmas. She smelled like bath salts and her hair was wet. "You need to stop watching him and regretting that you guys were never a thing," she paused to press the tears back into her eyes with the balls of her hands. "Yeah. I know," she whispered. She tells me to come to bed.

I turned off the tv. Evelyn didn't take her eyes off me and I from her. That robe was falling off at her shoulders, those beautiful unblemished shoulders. Her legs looked soft, dewey, and voluptuous. This is the woman you keep making me forget. I lifted myself from that couch and with my hands cupping her face I kissed my wife the way she's deserved to be kissed all along. She opens her mouth and my tongue meets hers to slow dance. Everything is as warm and familiar as a hot shower in your own home after a long vacation.

Having sex with a woman is so different. I felt powerful and fulfilled pushing into my wife on our bed. Every moan of hers was genuine, rife with the appreciation of this long-postponed act of love. Her chin settled on my shoulder. Her breasts were pressed against my chest and her legs wrapped tightly around my hips. That smell. That warmth. There was something so comforting there. I was with my wife when what I needed from you occurred to me. I make myself sick sometimes.

I met you again in that secret place we have in my studio. It's really just a spare room. Not a dressing room and not quite a board room. One day we rolled a television in there and lugged an inherited couch into the center of the room. Sometimes we would play video games, or watch movies. Other times we would just pull the couch out and sleep there, and drink beers from our mini fridge. It was are private oasis in the eye of all the chaos that afflicted our lives. That day you were there waiting for me.

You looked comfortable sitting up on the pull out bed watching some cheesy show. You were wearing blue jeans and a Black Keys band t-shirt. God damn you didn't even need to apologize. I crawled to your side and rested my head on your chest. You kissed my hair and draped your lazy arm on my side. You're eyes looked straight ahead. You weren't going to talk about it.

"Would you marry me if you could?" I blurted out.

You stammered out that you loved me but there was Tracey and the kids to think about, not to mention my wife and kids.

I told you that wasn't what I meant. What I had meant to ask you was if you could commit yourself solely to Tracey and I. You could have your wife and you could have me. But I don't want you if you want to embark on several different trysts. I only want you if you're stepping out on Tracey because you love me, nothing else.

You smiled and said "I do." You pulled me closer to you and let me fall asleep there in that comfortable place so secure.

If you could be my secret husband I could feel at home both with you and with my wife.


End file.
